Dominance in relationships has long had a difficult reputation and has been viewed as abuse. But these aren’t the only ways the domain appears. When used in the right context and the right form, domination and to become dominant in relationship can be a good thing. It can be a way to improve relationships and to make sure both parties get what they want as much as possible.
What is dominance?
Domination means being in control of something, and for those in a relationship, this has long been misidentified as having sole control over one’s partner. Instead, dominance can be used healthily and can be applied to both partners equally. This allows each partner to feel that they have some level of control and this also ensures that both partners can get what they want and need in the relationship. Consequently, when both partners exercise dominance, they are taking control of the situation together and are not sacrificing the individual needs they have.
Become dominant in relationship in a healthy way
The first thing that needs to be addressed when securing healthy dominance
1. Both partners to exercise dominance.
If only one partner is exercising dominance and the other is submissive, it means that one partner will get what he wants at all times and the other partner will consistently submit to them. This leads to an unhealthy relationship where a partner constantly loses the things that are important to him or that he needs to feel loved and cared for.
Healthy domination requires both partners to be able to stand up for themselves and to be able to express their wants and needs effectively. If a partner is struggling with this, it is important to get additional help and support to encourage. After all, if one partner is unable to move comfortably in a dominant lifestyle, she will not be able to get what she needs from the other partner. This can lead to problems within the relationship and can make it difficult for the relationship to continue.
2. Everyone has to meet their own needs
One way to start a path of domination healthily is to make sure both partners feel comfortable giving voice to what they need. These needs could be minor things, such as needing food or shelter. They may be more extensive, such as the need for companionship at a given time. The important thing is not what kind of needs each partner has, but that they feel comfortable talking to the other person about those needs when they need them. This allows the other partner to do what she can to help and sustain the relationship healthily.
Second, both partners need to feel comfortable expressing their wishes to each other. Where needs are sometimes easier because they focus on the fundamental aspects of the human condition, desires can seem a little more frivolous. Partners who struggle to express themselves often struggle with this because they feel that it is unimportant or that their desires are difficult to explain to their partner. A desire could be anything and that is why some partners will struggle because they feel their desires are foolish or their partner won’t understand them.
If either partner doesn’t feel comfortable expressing their wishes, it doesn’t matter how ‘silly’ they are. they could be, it could mean something bad for the relationship. Not only that, it means that one or both partners are struggling with the dominance they are exhibiting. This could cause one partner to be more dominant than the other, and it could mean that both partners need some help to provide the right level of support and encouragement to each other. The key is to recognize where the problems lie as quickly as possible and look for ways each partner can make changes in the relationship.
3. Learn to dominate the right way
For those struggling with this process, the first thing is to start small. Expressing basic needs could be something as simple as “I need something for dinner”. It is an expression of a basic need and it is something that should be easy to express because the individual understands that this is a need that everyone around him has. The need to eat is a common, understandable, and easy to express a need. This, however, must be done repeatedly for the individual to feel more comfortable and feel as though his partner is interested in helping him.
From there, each partner must begin to feel comfortable expressing wishes. In this practice, it may be possible for each partner to commit to making at least one wish each day, for something that is not a basic necessity. This could be a desire for a specific object or partner to give them an answer or something. The requirement is that each partner is required to make the request and the other partner is required to listen and complete the request.
As each partner becomes more comfortable with these things, it will become second nature for each partner to express themselves more fully and for the other partner to equally respond to their needs or wants appropriately. The best way to do this is also to learn more about the opposite side of the personality. It’s not just about figuring out how to be dominant and how to be in control at all times. It’s also about learning to let your partner have the things she wants and needs, and that also requires a level of submission.
4. Understanding healthy submission
As with domination, submission has always had a negative undertone, as many believe this is simply giving up and letting others walk on them. While this is an iteration of submission, it is not the healthy way it is done and as such, it is not the method to be discussed here. Instead, healthy submission is being able to balance dominance and control with partner submission and support. This is a complex balance and one that even the most experienced partners can sometimes struggle with. However, it is extremely important.
Being able to take charge and tell a partner what is needed or desired is healthy and will lead to improvements within the relationship, provided that the other partner also has a chance to express their needs and wants. If they are, each partner will demonstrate dominance and submission by default. But there are other aspects of this process as well. To be a healthy submissive, the partner doesn’t just have to agree to everything their partner says. There must be a level of give and take at all times.
The partner must be able to understand when it is time to let his partner have his way and when it is important to take what he needs. This means weighing situations at all times and determining which needs should be addressed at the moment. If one partner is hungry and the other is not, food should be a priority. The partner who is not hungry can be submissive in this case and the hungry partner can be a dominant in relationship. While this is a simplistic example, it shows that both partners take care of their needs and their partners at the same time.
What are the traits of a dominant personality?
The traits of a dominant personality are:
- Strong
- Bold
- Bossy
- Authoritative
- Control
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However, when viewed from a dominant-submissive relationship, so too is the dominant personality
Extremely concerned about their subtitle satisfaction
Able to control the amount of satisfaction obtained by their diver
Able to control the amount of pleasure both parties receive
As you can see, in a dominant-submissive type relationship, how the submissive feels is just as important, or more important, than how the dominant person feels.
How do you handle a dominant person?
If you are close to a dominant person you don’t like, it’s best to keep your distance from them. However, not all dominant people are bad. Some dominant people are dominant in the bedroom only when role-playing and are quite shy with the general public. Other people are dominant in all aspects of their life and drain your mental and physical energies. If this is the type of person you are dealing with, it is best to avoid as much interaction as possible. It’s okay to cut toxic, dominant people out of your life. It doesn’t make you a bad person when you protect your overall mental health.
How do you handle a dominant boyfriend?
If you are in a secondary dom relationship with a dominant partner and the dom is your boyfriend, anticipate that the relationship requires limits and guidelines. However, don’t expect an engagement ring. Relational sex and dominant partners who desire relationship sex are not necessarily seen as the same.
The common way people justify involvement in a secondary dom relationship or dominant partner relationship is that they enjoy rough sex. However, dominant partners aren’t just sex toys meant to be used loosely. Also, they shouldn’t expect to receive an engagement ring. Some dominant relationships with a low sex drive are based on the need for someone to be around. Dominant men may not have had a loving mother and just want their dominant partners to provide what they didn’t have as children. While this sounds bizarre, it’s not meant to be considered incestual. It means that the desire for a trusting dominant relationship as an adult may seem like dominant relationships are based more on love than on lust. These relationships with low sex drive are even more about the desire to be loved than the desire for a sexual role play.
